The Howl Within Every Word

The world aspires to a state of low energy, which is a higher feline state, this is the second law of catodynamics, and spiritual laziness has already reached such high levels that it's difficult to surpass them. And indeed, secularism is gradually losing its appeal, because if once it was lazier than religion - today religion is easier than it, and worst of all - more natural. Who has the energy for evolution, when science itself supports the theory of catolution

God is the King  (Source)

I dreamed that God decides he's a cat. Because he's tired of all the pressures. It's not that he can't handle them, because he's God, but he doesn't want to. And he'll do what he wants, because it's God's will. So now he's a cat and what are you going to do about it, let the world update according to the new philosophical starting point. Because logically, it's not the world that determines God but is determined by God. And thus said God: Meow.

And all the angels are filled with fear of the cat lying in the heavens, and are afraid that he will hunt them like birds, and they take their wings and flee. And the skies become clean of spirituality, and some lazy essence takes over the entire universe and existence. Something very spoiled is happening in all fields of knowledge, and no one understands where this indulgence comes from, how suddenly people can afford it. Sleeping late and demanding food. No one wants to work. Or study. Just to make an occasional leap, with half a minute's effort, and catch something fat, or decide that you've caught it, and wait for applause. No one writes anything that takes more than two minutes, and certainly doesn't read (because reading is already considered an inferior type of writing, very bad and reverse writing - writing inward). And even the most greedy economic activity is based on start-up companies. Sleeping until noon, making one leap, and then feeling like we've done our daily quota, and even touched the sky (maybe to the extent of justice, considering the new God). On the other hand, it turns out that those who lose the most appeal and suffer from the new situation are the religions, which are all dying in impressive ideological laziness, to which they adhere with devotion.

But it turns out that the first religion that finds it easiest to adapt to the new situation of God as a cat is actually Islam. Because their monotheism is the simplest and most simplistic, so instead of Allahu Akbar they now commit suicide with Allahu Cat, and anyway who has the energy to commit suicide. Occasionally they shout from the hammock: Jihad! and feel they've done above and beyond. Then, the second religion that manages to adapt to the situation successfully is Christianity. Because if a virgin can give birth to a man, she can also give birth to a cat. Right? And then the son of God is a cute kitten, who doesn't have the energy to get up from the cross, so he just falls asleep, even if it's a bit uncomfortable - he's already suffered enough for the whole world. And then the Mother of God is the Cat Lady - and everything fits perfectly. No one has the energy for scholasticism anymore anyway. This isn't the Middle Ages, it's the Cat Era. And all kinds of lazy intellectuals (yes, even the secular ones have been infected) say: It's easier to imagine the end of the world than the end of egoism, and anyway we're living in the era of late egoism (or something like that, who has the energy to think in this heat, it's already too late in history to think), and this is the satiated, tired, and mainly lazy egoism. Not some dangerous egoism. Not some aspiration for a superman, but for a pet. And the main thing is that cats don't make wars, right?

But only Judaism finds itself in serious trouble. Because if God is a cat, then worshiping God - is idolatry! And what do we do? Who do we pray to, or rather, meow to? And the rabbis don't know how to update the Halacha [Jewish law] to a situation where God is a cat. Maybe we need to listen not to the word of God but to his yawn? Maybe we need six days of Sabbath and one day of work? And maybe instead of long beards we need to start growing huge mustaches? And instead of head tefillin [phylacteries] we need tail tefillin? And speaking of tails, where's the circumcision now? But in the end, the rabbis become more and more fat, proud and lazy, and even if nothing fits, it's already hard to distinguish between them and black cats guarding the milk, and the Torah is after all compared to milk in a bowl, as it is written "and milk under your tongue" etc., etc., and so on, and that's it, and no more needs to be said, and there's no need to elaborate.

But those who really got screwed are the secular people. Because what can secularism be when religiosity is catness. What's the relevance of heresy, when all God does is meow? Who can be a greater heretic than one who believes in a cat with a long invisible mustache in the sky that has been sleeping for two thousand years? How can one be intellectually lazier than what the old religion offers? After all, the world aspires to a state of low energy, which is a higher feline state, this is the second law of catodynamics, and spiritual laziness has already reached such high levels that it's difficult to surpass them.

And indeed, secularism is gradually losing its appeal, because if once it was lazier than religion - today religion is easier than it, and worst of all - more natural. Who has the energy for evolution, when science itself supports the theory of catolution, and everything only aspires to equilibrium and decay and return to a state of rest. Nature itself is in favor of a black cat in the sky, according to the Big Yawn theory on the creation of the universe, and even the supermassive black hole at the center of galaxies has already been replaced by astrophysicats with a chubby cat. Because really, what difference is there between a black cat and a black circle, if no light escapes from it, and everything it broadcasts collapses back into it, every word that comes out of its mouth is immediately swallowed back into its throat. No information can come out of it, only it sees the whole world, and the world doesn't see it. Just like the cat, blessed be He.

So in such a situation, is there a difference between a circle and a hole? And if you say it has an enormous gravitational pull on the world, it's precisely because of this gravitational pull - nothing will ever come out of it to the world. Because the escape velocity needed from the darkness is even greater than the speed of light, I'm telling you, but you will never hear what I've ever said. Because the speed of sound is much lower than the speed of its decay. And only one short syllable is still heard in the world, some frequency of howl that envelops the entire universe from creation to the end of all days, in a kind of cosmic background radiation to everything that is said. Meow.